Sex Toy Q&A

If you have a general question about a new or existing order or a questions about shipping, privacy, our business ethics, leaving a review or using your new toys, please visit our general FAQ page here. For all other questions relating to Sex Toys, please see below to find information about; Types and Materials of Sex Toys, Sexual Health Questions, Sex Life Anatomy and our All About Lube Q&A.


What is a sex toy?

A sex toy is an object or device used for sexual stimulation or to enhance sexual pleasure. There are many different kinds of sex toy, including dildos, vibrators, butt plugs and more.

Is it normal to want a sex toy?

Absolutely! It is perfectly normal to desire pleasure and sex toys are a wonderful way to achieve lots of pleasurable orgasms. Sex toys are absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, and most people you know probably have at least one tucked away at the back of their sock drawer!

What vibrator should I get?

Choosing a vibrator totally depends on what you want from it. A beginner may want to start with something small, like a bullet, and somebody with a penis may want a something like a masturbation cup. You may be buying for use with your partner(s), in which case something like a remote-controlled love egg may be more appealing. 

Learn more about which sex toy suits you here.

What is the best sex toy for beginners?

Everybody is different, but if you’re new to the world of sex toys, it might be a good idea to start off with something simplistic. 

For people with a vulva we’d recommend starting out with something like our vibrating bullet Elemi or Cassia, our small wand vibrator. If you’d prefer not to jump in with a vibrator, Tansy G-curve would be a good for beginners dildo.

For people with a penis, we’d recommend our penis cup Bergamot, designed to cup and vibrate around the penis.

If you’re a beginner, but would like to start with anal play – Hyssop, our set of 4 different sized silicone butt plugs would be our recommendation for a good introduction to anal fun.

I’m sensitive and my vibrator is too intense, what can I do?

Vibrators vary in strength and the genital area is extremely sensitive. Especially if you’re new to vibrators, it’s not uncommon to take a bit of time to get used to them. 

If the vibrations of your toy feel too strong for you at first, try experimenting with using the toy over your underwear or a thin piece of fabric for a more gentle sensation. Remember – there is no incorrect way to use a sex toy!

If you have a vulva, you can also try using the vibrator just to the side of your clitoris, rather than directly on it, which can give an amazing more muffled vibration. 

Another great way to have more control of the strength of vibration is to place your toy underneath you, so you can grind on the toy and move your pelvis accordingly to what feels good for you.

Are there male sex toys?

All sex toys can be used for all genders and do not need to be bound to one specific use. However, there are many sex toys designed for the penis, as well as to stimulate the prostate and increase pleasure through anal play. 

Good examples would be cock rings, masturbation cups, designed to “cup” around the penis, and prostate massagers, designed to stimulate and give pleasure via the “male g-spot”.

Are sex toys healthy?

Sex toys = orgasms. Having more orgasms comes with many health benefits, from improved mood, to better sleep and improved blood circulation. 

Sex toys are perfectly healthy and highly recommended from a health perspective as long as they’re used responsibly, kept clean and are made of a body safe material.

Are sex toys waterproof?

Our entire range of sex toys can be used safely in water up to a depth of 20cm, perfect for play time in the shower.

What is bondage?

Bondage is the sexual practice of consensually tying, binding or restraining a partner. Bondage is a form of BDSM, and can involve anything from handcuffs to Shibari (ancient Japanese rope tying). 

You can find our bondage range, Kanuka, here.

What is BDSM?

BDSM is an abbreviation for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism & Masochism. BDSM is any sexual activity that involves any kind of consensual bondage, domination, submission, control play between partners and giving or receiving pain for pleasure. 

BDSM is a relatively common kink and/or fetish and is commonly associated with the film 50 Shades of Gray as it became more popularised upon its release. However, BDSM was around and thriving long before 2015. 

What is a kink?

A kink is the arousal from and interest in unusual or non-conventional sexual practices, concepts or fantasies. Someone who has interest in BDSM for example, may be described as “kinky”.

What is a fetish?

A fetish is an unusual or non-conventional sexual practice, object, concept or fantasy that is almost exclusively necessary for the person to become aroused and enjoy sex.

What is Shibari?

Shibari is the ancient Japanese art and practice of knot tying. It can be used during sexual practices and involves binding yourself or a partner with pieces of rope, using intricate methodical patterns and knot tying.

What is the difference between a kink and a fetish?

A kink and a fetish are very similar to each other and one is frequently mistaken for the other. They’re similar in the sense that they both involve arousal from or interest in unusual or non-conventional sexual practices, concepts or fantasies.

The main difference between a kink and a fetish is that a kink is something you may find really enjoyable, but isn’t always wanted or needed to enjoy sex. Whereas a fetish is something that is almost exclusively necessary for arousal and/or enjoyment during sex.

For example, if somebody has a feet kink, they may occasionally involve and get enjoyment out of the involvement of foot play during sex, but do not need the involvement of foot play to be aroused or enjoy sex. Whereas if somebody has a feet fetish, they will require foot play during almost every sexual experience in order to become aroused and/or enjoy sex, thus would not enjoy sex without involvement of feet.

Is it weird to give a sex toy as a gift?

No! Maybe we’re biased but we think sex toys are a wonderful idea for a gift. 

We think sex positivity is healthy and important and gifting sex toys is a great way to practice that. We’re not suggesting buying your Mum a dildo for her birthday, but sex toys can be a great (and well appreciated) gift for your partner(s) or even your best girl friends! 

You can browse our selection of sex toy hampers here.


What is a dildo?

A dildo is a sex toy that is shaped to resemble an erect penis. Dildos can be made from all different kinds of materials, including glass, silicone, plastic, jelly rubber and metal. 

Are glass dildos safe?

Contrary to what you might think, glass dildos are actually one of the safest materials for sex toys. They’re sanitary, easy to clean, non-porous, hypoallergenic and non-toxic. 

Glass sex toys are made out of a special kind of glass called borosilicate glass, and will not break inside of you.

You can read more about the benefits of Glass Dildos here.

What is a vibrator?

A vibrator is a sex toy with a vibrating motor for increased sexual stimulation. Vibrators can come in many different shapes, sizes and materials.

What is the difference between a dildo and a vibrator?

Dildos and vibrators are both a kind of sex toy. Dildos are exclusively phallus shaped and may or may not vibrate. Vibrators exclusively vibrate and come in a variety of different shapes, like bullet, rabbit ears and including dildo shaped (a vibrating dildo). 

What is clitoral suction?

Clitoral suction is a newer kind of clitoris stimulating sex toy. They usually feature a small hole-like “suction cup” designed to be placed over the clitoris and give a sucking sensation. These types of toy often also vibrate.

What is a love egg?

A love egg is a type of sensual toy that is egg or bullet shaped that can be completely inserted into the vagina or anus due to their small size. They often vibrate with a remote control intended for couples play or can be weighted in the form of kegel or “Ben Wa” balls. Love eggs usually have an external element used for retrieval and removal of the toy.

What is a cock ring?

A cock ring is a circular shaped flexible sex toy designed to be worn around the base of the penis with the purpose of restricting blood flow to produce and maintain a stronger erection for a longer period of time. 

Cock rings can be bought as just the ring itself but more commonly come with a vibrating element primarily designed to stimulate the clitoris during penis in vagina sex. They may sometimes come with a second ring designed to go around the testicles, this is not the case here at The Natural Love Company.

We recommend using a touch of our organic lubricant for easier use and sustained arousal.

Why are cock rings designed to be tight on a penis?

Cock rings are designed to be tight and worn around the base of the penis with the purpose of restricting blood flow to produce and maintain a stronger erection for a longer period of time. 

What is a rabbit vibrator?

A rabbit vibrator is a kind of dildo which has an element of clitoral stimulation in the form of vibrating bunny ears. 

They were originally made to look like rabbits to bypass Japanese obscenity laws because manufacturers weren’t actually allowed to produce sex toys. Rabbit vibrators became universally popular in 1998 after being featured in a Sex and the City storyline. 

What is a masturbation cup?

A masturbation cup is a kind of vibrating sex toy that is designed to “cup” around the penis for intense pleasure during masturbation.

What is a butt plug?

A butt plug is a sex toy designed to be inserted anally. They’re often fairly small in size and have a flanged end designed to keep it in place and prevent the toy from entirely entering the rectum. They can be used as preparation for anal sex or to increase pleasure by stimulating the anal nerve endings or prostate during sex or masturbation

They usually don’t vibrate, although there are vibrating ones on the market. 

What are kegel balls?

Kegel balls are small (usually weighted) balls designed to be inserted into the vagina. Their purpose is either to increase sexual pleasure and arousal as a form of extended foreplay or to train the pelvic floor muscles. 

Their weights are usually ranged between 20 to 150 grams, and they can often be bought in sets of varied weight. They are sometimes available as stand-alone balls, but more commonly come with an external element used for retrieval and removal.

What are anal beads?

Anal beads are a tapered length of multiple sized spheres attached together graduating from small to large. They’re designed to be inserted anally and removed at various speeds depending on the desired sensation. 

Anal beads can also be used to intensify orgasm by removing them at the moment of climax. They often have an external element, such as finger loops, used for retrieval and removal.

What is a prostate massager?

A prostate massager is a kind of sex toy that is inserted anally to stimulate the prostate. They often look similar to a butt plug, although usually larger in size and with an extra external element that rests on the perineum (the area between the anus and genitals). Prostate massagers usually vibrate and can also commonly have features like rotation.

What is a bullet vibrator?

A bullet vibrator is a small bullet-shaped vibrating sex toy, primarily used for stimulating the clitoris. They’re one of the most discreet vibrators and are a great choice for beginners.

What is a wand vibrator?

A wand vibrator is a sex toy, usually large in size, that’s made up of a handle with a vibrating rounded ball on the end. Wand vibrators can also be known as “magic wands”. They can be used as a massager as well as a sex toy, and are known or clitoral stimulation and a more “rumbly” sensation of vibration.


What are sex toys made of?

Sex toys can be made of many different materials including silicone, glass, plastic, jelly rubber and metal. It’s important to be mindful when choosing a sex toy as not all of the common materials are body safe.

Our entire range of sex toys are made out of either glass or silicone (our two favourite and body-safe) materials.

Are silicone toys body safe?

Yes, whilst the type texture and feel of silicone varies across our range, the silicone used is designed for and always completely body safe. For more information about silicone toys, check out all you need to know about Glass vs Silicone.

Will your glass toys break?

A glass toy is NOT going to break inside of you and/or create the horror movie scene you might be picturing in your head. I promise. Glass toys are made of a special kind of glass called Borosilicate Glass. For more information about glass toys, check out all you need to know about Glass vs Silicone.


What are pelvic floor muscles?

Pelvic floor muscles span across the bottom of the pelvis and support the pelvic organs (bladder, bowel and uterus). They give you the ability to control the release of urine, faeces and flatus (gas) upon contraction.

What is a pelvic floor exercise?

Pelvic floor exercise is the practice of contracting the pelvic floor muscles in order to strengthen them. Some people may use weighted Kegel balls as a tool to enhance the workout. Benefits of strengthening the pelvic floor include helping urinary incontinence, treating pelvic organ prolapse and better sex.

What is douching?

Douching is the practice of washing and cleaning the inside of the rectum with water or another liquid. Some people like to practice douching as preparation for anal sex or simply for the clean feeling. 

In the past, douching has also been commonly practiced as a method to clean the vagina. However, it is not recommended, as the vagina is already a self-cleansing organ and douching will likely disturb the natural ph, and cause unpleasant bacterial infections like thrush.

What is a douche?

A douche is a device used to squirt water or other liquids into the rectum in order to clean out the area. 

In the past, douching has also been commonly practiced as a method to clean the vagina. However, it is not recommended, as the vagina is already a self-cleansing organ and douching will likely disturb the natural ph, and cause unpleasant bacterial infections like thrush. 

Do dildos need condoms?

As long as your dildo is made of a body-safe material such as silicone, glass or metal, a condom isn’t required for safe personal use as long as you are properly cleaning your toys before and after each use. 

Condoms are recommended for use of dildos that aren’t made of body-safe materials, such as jelly rubber or plastic (but we don’t sell any of those).

However, it is recommended to use condoms or to clean between each person if you are sharing your dildos. If you choose to use condoms with your sex toys, be aware that many condoms are packaged with silicone-based lubricant, which can in turn break down and degrade your silicone toys.

How do I properly clean my sex toys?

We recommend cleaning with Simply Toy Cleaner for a thorough clean. 

Simply spray the entire surface of your sex toy liberally, wait 30 seconds for it to work its cleansing antibacterial magic, then rinse with cool water (subject to toy manufactures instructions). Simply Toy Cleaner is compatible with our full range of sex toys.

If men enjoy anal sex/play, does that mean they’re gay?

Not at all. Many people enjoy anal sex and pleasure and it has absolutely zero determination on sexuality. 

Men with prostates will actually experience increased pleasure with anal play, as the prostate is known as the male G-Spot and can often lead to orgasm. 


What is a prostate?

The prostate is a walnut-sized gland located between the bladder and the penis. It is a part of the male reproductive system, and helps to produce some of the fluids in semen. 

The prostate is often referred to as the “male g-spot” as stimulation via the rectum can be incredibly pleasurable and can lead to orgasm.

What is the best sex toy for the G-spot?

Any kind of dildo with a curved end is optimal for G-spot stimulation. We’d recommend Tansy G-Curve or Cassia for pure G-spot goodness and Saro or Camphor for extra added clitoral stimulation.

If you have a prostate (commonly known as the male g-spot) then we’d recommend Davana or Tansy Anal.


What is lube?

Lube (lubricant) is a liquid or gel used to reduce friction during sex or masturbation. Lube makes for a more wet and slippery experience, makes insertion of toys, penises and fingers more effortless, eases penetration and can make sex and masturbation more pleasurable, and can eliminate any pain experienced. 

There are three main types of lubricant being oil-based, water-based and silicone based. There are also flavoured lubes for purposes of more delicious oral sex as well as lubes created with various sensations such as “tingling” or “warming” to heighten pleasure.

Can you use lube with sex toys?

All of our sex toys are confirmed suitable (and recommended) for use with water-based lubricant. 

Silicone toys are however not recommended for use with with silicone-based lube as it can break down and degrade the material of the toy. Silicone-based lube can be used safely with our glass toys.

Oil-based lubricant can be used safely with all of our sex toys, but it is important to remember that oil-based is not compatible for use with condoms as it can break down and degrade the material of the condom. 

Long story short – we recommend water-based!

Do I *need* to use lube with sex toys?

Lube is necessary if you’re using toys anally or if you experience vaginal dryness.

It’s not mandatory if there’s already sufficient natural lubricant upon use, but is always encouraged and recommended for increased pleasure, comfort and ease of use. We love lube. 

Why do people use lube?

People can use lube for all kinds of different reasons. Common reasons being to reduce friction and ease penetration, to create adequate lubrication for anal sex, for comfort upon insertion of sex toys and for increased pleasure during sex and masturbation.

What makes lube 'organic?

When we say “organic lube”, this means that 99.2% of ingredients in our lubricant is free of, and grown or processed without using additives like synthetic chemicals, artificial fertilisers, and hormones (which is unfortunately very common in the world of lube). We didn’t think chemicals and fertilisers belonged anywhere near your genitals, so we left all that harmful stuff out. Simple, right? We think so!

You can find our Organic Lube here.

How do I dispose of your lube bottles?

All our bottles are made with wheat plastics which as well as sounding rather funky, it also means that they’re easily compostable.

You can simply dispose your used bottles with normal household waste or even compost in a home garden / veg patch or compost bin. The bottle will then break down in approximately 6 months, often less.

If you have a plastic pump head, this should be removed and either reused with your next bottle of Simply Lube or you may choose to recycle the plastic lid with other household plastics.

We’re also working to make our lids and pumps compostable too – coming soon!

You can read more about wheat plastics here.

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