In the hyper-connected world we live in, our physical intimacy is more important than ever. And it’s exactly through this connectivity that conversations have begun opening up around sex positivity, health and experimentation. With onscreen representation in tv shows like Showtime’s Masters of Sex and Netflix’s Bonding, and apps and websites like KNKI and fetish.com, sexual play has been growing increasingly accessible, too. But what does that mean for you? And where do you even begin if you’re only just thinking about trying something new with your partner?
Busy schedules can make finding time to sit down together tough – but sometimes just disengaging from the noise around you can be a great start in helping you to focus on your own wants as well as connecting with the needs of your partner. Working out what really turns each other on, whether through telling or showing, can be exciting in itself. And don’t feel weird about it! Neither of you are mind readers, no matter how long you’ve been together. Plus, it turns out that mixing things up in the bedroom is actually good for your sex life: a 2016 study showed sexual satisfaction to be higher among people who “had sex more frequently, received more oral sex, had more consistent orgasms, incorporated more variety of sexual acts, took the time to set a mood and practiced effective sexual communication,” said David Frederick, Ph.D, lead author of the study at Chapman University. So take time to block out all the distractions for an evening, and light a scented candle while you divulge your deepest fantasies to each other. Sharing your desires is incredibly intimate, and the experience will be amazing foreplay. So whether you’re dying to dip your toe with some light restraint, wanting to try anal for the first time, or there’s a fetish you want to explore – now’s the time to give it a go.
**The University of Toronto. “Study reveals secret to a happy sex life.” ScienceDaily. ScienceDaily, 8 November 2016.